Because Sometimes You Just Want to Disappear Without Joining a Witness Protection Program

Alright, listen up, folks!
You ever dream of retiring somewhere peaceful, away from all the chaos? Well, I’ve got ten towns so secluded, they make your in-laws’ place look like Times Square! These spots aren’t just quiet — they’re off the grid, baby.

Don’t worry, I’ll break down the taxes, housing, and whether Medicare’s gonna save your bacon. So grab your coffee, sit back, and get ready, because I’m starting with the least secluded and working my way up to “you might need a bloodhound to find it.”
So.
Let’s.
Dive.
In.

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10. Ely, Minnesota

Ely, Minnesota, cozies up to the Superior National Forest and the Boundary Waters Canoe Area. The population is about 3,200, with 22% retirees. Housing is moderately priced around $227,000, and homeowners' insurance averages $1,000 a year. Minnesota taxes Social Security partially and has a state income tax ranging from 5.35% to 9.85%. Retirees will need about $40,000 to $50,000 annually to live comfortably. Medicare access is excellent thanks to local hospitals and clinics, but utility bills do spike during those subarctic winters.

9. Wallace, Idaho

Wallace, Idaho, looks like a postcard from the Old West with a tiny population of 784 and about 20% retirees. The average home price sits around $240,000, with homeowners' insurance averaging $800 a year. Idaho is extremely tax-friendly for retirees, with no Social Security tax and low property taxes. An annual income of $35,000 to $45,000 covers a comfortable life here. Medicare access is adequate locally, but you might have to hit the road for specialized care. Wallace’s silver mines and historic saloons make it a fun step back in time — just be patient with those Amazon Prime deliveries.

8. Marfa, Texas

Marfa, Texas, blends quirky desert vibes with minimalist living. With a population of about 1,800 and 24% retirees, it’s a great off-grid spot. Average home prices run around $300,000, and homeowners' insurance hovers near $1,200 per year. Texas doesn’t tax income, including Social Security, which is music to any retiree’s ears. You’ll need about $35,000 to $45,000 annually to live comfortably. Medicare access is decent, with clinics in town and hospitals within a 60-mile drive. Between the Marfa Lights and art installations, you’ll always have something weird and wonderful to brag about.

7. Eureka Springs, Arkansas

Eureka Springs, Arkansas, is packed with Victorian charm and natural beauty. The town has about 2,100 residents, with nearly 30% over 65. Average home prices sit at $306,000, and homeowners' insurance costs about $1,000 a year. Arkansas is retiree-friendly with no tax on Social Security and low state taxes overall. Retirees need roughly $40,000 to $50,000 annually to cover life here. Medicare access is solid, with good local care but specialized services about 50 miles away in Fayetteville. It’s a historic, artsy haven that will make every day feel like a vintage postcard.

6. Moab, Utah

Moab, Utah, is the retirement dream for outdoor junkies swapping their desk jobs for desert hikes. It’s home to 5,500 residents, with 18% retirees. The average home price is about $557,000, reflecting its rising popularity. Homeowners' insurance averages $1,100 annually. Utah partially taxes Social Security but has low property taxes, with retirees needing around $45,000 to $55,000 per year for comfort. Medicare access is solid locally, though major procedures may require heading to Grand Junction, Colorado. With Arches and Canyonlands National Parks in your backyard, you’ll have no excuse to sit still.

5. Winslow, Arizona

Winslow, Arizona — yes, the one from that famous Eagles song — is a low-key paradise for retirees wanting wide-open skies. The town’s population sits around 9,400, with about 19% retirees. Home prices average a very affordable $190,000, and homeowners' insurance costs about $1,000 yearly. Arizona offers excellent retiree tax breaks with no tax on Social Security. You’ll need $35,000 to $45,000 annually to kick back comfortably here. Medicare access is good, with hospitals and clinics nearby. Life here feels like one long, easy-going Route 66 road trip — without the overpriced motel stays.

4. Truth or Consequences, New Mexico

Truth or Consequences, New Mexico, or “T or C” if you’re hip, is famous for its hot springs and relaxed vibe. With 6,100 residents and about 25% retirees, it’s a true retirement community. Housing averages $145,000, and homeowners' insurance costs about $900 per year. New Mexico does tax Social Security but makes up for it with extremely low property taxes. You’ll need just $30,000 to $40,000 annually for a good lifestyle. Medicare access is solid, with specialized care available about an hour away in Las Cruces. Plus, soaking in those geothermal springs beats a pricey spa membership any day.

3. Elgin, Oregon

Elgin, Oregon, is your classic hidden gem tucked into the Blue Mountains. With a population of just 1,600 and 23% retirees, it’s as peaceful as it gets. Average home prices are about $246,000, with homeowners' insurance running about $950 annually. Oregon doesn’t tax Social Security benefits but does have a higher state income tax overall. Retirees need around $40,000 to $50,000 yearly to cover everything, including occasional trips into bigger cities for specialized healthcare. If you’re seeking a small, tight-knit community where the biggest news is who caught the biggest trout, Elgin’s your spot.

2. Ophir, Colorado

Ophir, Colorado, is so hidden, it practically doesn’t exist on GPS. The town has just 180 people, with about 20% retirees. Homes here cost an eye-watering $884,000, and homeowners' insurance can top $2,500 a year due to heavy snow and tough terrain. Colorado taxes Social Security only up to certain thresholds, and retirees need between $60,000 and $80,000 a year to survive comfortably — and to buy enough shovels. Medicare access is limited but available in nearby Telluride. If you can afford it, Ophir offers mind-blowing beauty and the kind of peace and quiet most people only dream about.

1. Whittier, Alaska

Finally, Whittier, Alaska , the most secluded retirement town on the list. About 280 residents, with 15% retirees, all mostly living inside the same massive building: Begich Towers. Housing is extremely affordable at about $150,000 for a condo, and HOA fees of around $350 a month cover utilities and maintenance. Alaska has no state income tax and no tax on Social Security benefits. You’ll need around $35,000 to $45,000 annually for a comfortable life, though grocery bills can be high due to shipping costs. Medicare access is limited locally, with larger medical centers available 90 minutes away in Anchorage. But for those craving ultimate solitude, breathtaking scenery, and a community where you truly know everyone, Whittier is retirement’s final frontier.

And until next time, Let’s Do Good Together.